Woman with Baby

TTC over 40? Start here!

Feb 12, 2021

If you're in your late 30s or 40s, one common reason why you’re experiencing challenges to getting pregnant  may be because you're focusing too much on the conventional approach of just addressing the ovaries and uterus with IVF, inseminations or solely focusing on egg quality or AMH levels. 

To significantly improve your chances of success you HAVE to go beyond that and start looking at ways to improve your fertility from a whole body perspective - that includes the rest of your physical but also your emotional and spiritual bodies.  This is the mind-body-spirit approach. 

If you haven't already, you can start embracing this holistic strategy by eating more nutrient-dense foods, taking supplements, exercising more, managing stress.  Those are all fantastic strategies and really help your fertility.  However, if you've already implemented them for at least six months without any results, it's time for more.

First and foremost, your number one priority is to shift your mindset... because it starts from the top down, meaning from the mind down to the body, not from the bottom up which is where most people start and end, including doctors.  By bottom up, I mean the ovaries and uterus. 

So do not allow your age, blood test levels like low AMH, or past history like pregnancy losses or failed IVFs or inseminations prevent you from believing that you can be successful.  You must believe that your fertility potential is more than your eggs and age and diagnosis and past history. 

That means whatever your doctor or online blog says about your fertility including your blood test numbers like low AMH... or your diagnosis of poor egg quality, diminished ovarian reserve...or your past history of pregnancy losses or failed medicated cycles...those diagnoses do NOT determine your future.    

Rather it’s your expectation of the future that will determine what you get.  Remember this: you get what you expect, not what you want.

So, take a minute to write down what you want as it pertains to your fertility journey.

Be clear about what you want which is a baby in your arms which is not the same thing as getting pregnant, raising AMH levels, improving egg quality, being younger, wishing they had started trying earlier, overcoming some diagnosed fertility health issue like fibroids or endometriosis, etc.

We all fall into this trap of focusing on what’s wrong and, in doing so, lose sight of our vision. And this is where the law of attraction comes into play...wherever your attention is, more of that will come, whether it’s good or bad.  Or as Tony Robbins puts it very succinctly, “Where focus goes, energy flows.” 

If you focus on the problem of getting pregnant, the problem continues to be there and in fact is magnified.  Instead focus on wanting a healthy baby...not higher AMH levels, better egg quality, being younger because who cares about all those if you have your baby?  It’s the baby - the result that you want.  It can be as simple as “I want a healthy baby after an easy 9 month pregnancy.”  

Now that you’re clear on “WHAT” you want, then you can hone in on WHY you want to have a baby.  So on a sheet of paper, draw a line down the middle.  On the left side, write down the emotions and feelings you expect to have when you’re holding your newborn baby in your arms.

Now, on the right side, write the emotions and the feelings that you currently feel on your fertility journey. 

Look at your list and comparing the two sides.  Do they match?

The farther apart the emotions on the right column are from the left column, the less likely you are to get pregnant.  Putting it another way, the closer the emotions are in the two columns, the better your chance of success.

The energy and vibration you give out currently must match what you want, without actually having your baby.

How does this translate on a day to day level where you focus less on your problem and more on your desire for a baby?  When you catch yourself talking about your obstacles to having your baby, change what you think, feel, say, and do to align with your vision because that’s truly what you want and that’s where your focus should be.